The Tale of the Cat with Two Tails

I remember asking my old friend Jeff "does that cat really have two tails?". Of course Jeff had the great idea to follow the cat and get a better look. Little did we know that this chain of small events would lead us to the longest night of our lives. We followed the large grey cat for about twenty minutes, he ran quickly through several allies and deselate back roads in which we only saw one pair of headlights. His grey fur glimmered in the full moon light we were graced to have so we had no trouble spotting his large body even at a distance.

Eventually we came to a large rundown warehouse on the outside of town, the place appeared to be deserted, but as we followed the enormous cat inside the cracked walls we found that it wasn't so at all. There was an large gathering of cats in a vestibule all around a stage area with two torches on its sides. The silence that preceded the grey two tailed cat died even more to where the slight breeze outside was like the engine of a desiel truck. Two thing were very apperent, that the two tailed cat was some kind of cat leader and that we shouldn't be hear.

As the giant grey two tailed cat began to speak we were in awe of what we heard. He spoke of how the ignorant humans stubbornly destroyed the natural habitat of the native ally cats blaming the humans for cleaning the streets and not throwing out as many scraps. I was no doubt that the evil gaint grey two tailed cat was planning some kind of revolution and it was even mor obvious that he was well of his rocker. As Jeff and I slowly began to make our overdue escape Jeff unfortunatly caught an old nail that tripped upon the wooden floor. The echo throughout the warehouse easily drowned out the speaker cats feeble voice. We darted for the nearest exit, about 35 yards away through a wide empty hallway. Evil cats quickly began flooded through the doorway that we had hidden in as we watched the congregation. After kicking in the door at the end of the hallway we found ourselves in a large storeroom almost the size of a football field. Evil cats were already entering from doors from across the room and we were fully surrounded. Luckily both Jeff and I had brought along our fully automatic rifles, .44 magnum handguns and several gernades apeice. We fought off the cats for several minutes but soon realized that the cats themselves outnumbered the amount of ammo we had. It was then that I noticed the moonlight shining into our battlefield. I looked up and saw that the roof was long gone. "up these old racks" I yelled at jeff as I started to climb towards the ceiling. The cats followed us closely and I could hear the fatique in Jeffs breathing, since being addicted to twinkies he didn't have the endurance he once had. I reached the top and turned to give him my hand and pull him up. Just before I clasped his hand the evil cats caught him from behind, he fell into the sea of evil cats below. The cats were but feet from reaching the top to I leaped to a remaining part of the roof and raced away looking for a way to ground level. The cloudy sky now covered the moon and the way was dark. Cats swarmed around me and I began to lose hope, soon I would be reunited with Jeff. Then luck came my way as large droplettes of rain began falling around me, first lightly and then harder and harder. The cats quickly retreted back into the warehouse and I took no time to put as much distance between myself and that place as I could.

Swine Flu

I think that the swine flu suck, but it could be a lot worse. I would really be tripping if it was like zombies. Like on that movie 28 days later, the zombies on that movie like sprint at full speed and just strait up eat yo butt ya know. That would stink. The main charactor in that movie woke up in a hospital were somebody had locked him in and slid the key under the door. They totally saved his life. He totally died right after he got out though... no not really he live for a while. The movie was pretty good though. Anyway, at least its no like that.

Teacher

Mrs. Lackey my 5th grade teacher in Aspermont was a really good teacher. She always seemed to teach you without you even knowing you were learning at all. She was really nice and always had fun activities to help us with the lesson. She is defiantly my second coolest teacher behind only Mrs. K of course because she is hands down the bestess ever.

The Missing Person

Evil Flying Monkeys attack of CHS.

This is a poem about the time I saved our school from the evil flying monkeys.

One fateful day in late July
A pack of flying monkeys came by way of the bright blue sky.
With destruction on their mind and hate in their eye,
They swooped onto CHS to just stop by.
Little did they know that I lay awaiting,
To give them a long overdue berating.
As swarmed by the hundreds to destroy our schoo,
I raised my 12 gauge and my shot was true.
I quickly expended all of my shells,
As they withdrew into the skies with angry yells.
Again they attacked in quite a hurry,
with no time to reload I used my fists of furry.
They bit and clawed at my skin,
as I repeatedly clocked them in their chin.
As wave upon wave attacked hour after hour,
My attitude grew all the more sour.
When my strength slowly began to stray,
I opened my Gatorade and quickly put it away.
Now that I was completely replenished,
It was time for these evil monkeys to be diminished.
Their limp lifeless bodies piled higher and higher,
The fight in their eyes began to retire.
Finally the evil flying monkey leader,
Said "we must flee from this vicious life reaper".

Salem

If I was accused of witchcraft in Salem I would run away and never come back. I wouldn't wait around for all those crazy little girls to point the finger at me, I would sell my belongings and jet. If I were accused before I could leave then I would try to pick the locks and run. I don't think I would admit to witchcraft to save my life. but I guess you never no intill you're their.

Nerf Factory Riot